Sorry for my absence recently. I’ve been too busy enjoying real life to be around here as often. I still love you all and love to write, so don’t disappear! I’m still here. : ) —–
Tonight I am falling asleep in a place I’ve always known. Familiar bed, familiar pillows, familiar sounds of quiet, distant airplanes and the dull hum of the freeway. My brothers are usually across the hall except when they come home late from their adventures with friends. My parents at the other end of the house, asleep a long time ago. The house is quiet enough for me to think.
I lie here in familiarity and wonder about the life God has for me. This life is one I do not yet know, but it will come upon me slowly, ever slowly, as I grow into it and pieces are revealed. I lie here and dream of what it might look like after a few more of those pieces of my life have been added.
I wonder about the people who come and go from my life and pray that those close to my heart will remain there for a long time. I wonder what it will be like when I see my best friend again and what new adventures we will have to tell our children and grandchildren about. I dream of the places we will go together and in our lives. I dream of all the laughter we will share, the joy of the friendships between our children, and the joy of friendship between our future-husbands.
I dream of him, the man I will someday marry, and the days when we are falling in love. I close my eyes and think about the nights we hold hands and walk together and look at the same stars and dream of what God has for us. I dream of the life I will lead as his wife and pray God keeps my heart steadfast toward him so I can be a good wife to my God-fearing husband.
Tonight I dream of my future and the joy it will bring. But tonight I also remember today is the future I used to dream about. There is joy to be found right now. If I am always dreaming about the joy in my future, I will never find it. I must learn to find joy here, live in joy now, and know that tomorrow’s joy is the joy I waited for yesterday.
I am such a dreamer and I need to remind myself to live in this moment now. I thank God that he has given me today because today is beautiful. Today there is every reason to be joyful.